PollyROFL all truthism, all the time

7Sep/102

Bob ‘Krueger’ Katter backs the Coalition

Article by: Peanut Cup

Bob 'Krueger' Katter is waiting for Julia to fall asleep

Key independent MP Bob Katter has announced he will back the Coalition in a minority government.

Mr Katter stated "Tony surprised me with an all-nighter that stopped me attacking him through his dreams...".

"I waited until the Labor government were asleep and then I struck." Mr Katter told reporters in Canberra.

"My colleagues ... they are still in discussions.  Or are they?"

Bob Katter backs the Coalition

[ UPDATE:  Bob backed the wrong horse and Julia Gillard is now Australia's PM.  Better luck next time Bobby boy ]

4Sep/100

Family Jewells of Fred Nile embroiled in net porn scandal

Article by: Polly Waffle

New South Wales Christian Democrat MP Fred Nile has been implicated in an internet pornography scandal.

Yesterday the state's Ports Minister Paul McLeay resigned after admitting he had used a parliamentary computer to access adult and gambling sites.  It's been said that Paul McLeary is covering up for Rev Nile and his former house-keeper has come forward with startling Revelations.

"Sometimes Freddie isn't always in control of his actions.  It's his penis you see.  It forces situations to arise and there's always a cover up when he's discovered".

The Daily Telegraph reports a parliamentary internet audit shows that Reverend Nile's computer has been used to access internet pornography.

Rev Fred Nile indicates his penis is asleep

Rev Nile has told the Telegraph his "staff" accessed the sites for "research purposes".

"It wasn't a one-off." Paul McLeary  said.

"I know the community expects more of its ministers and our MPs, and that's why I am personally humiliated and embarrassed.

"But I accept that it's wrong..."

Fred Nile denies "perving" at internet porn

30Aug/100

While we were sleeping

Article by: Peanut Cup

It's been months since we've posted and so much has happened.

We got a new PM, Tony Abott pulled an all-nighter and the Election 2010 resulted in a hung parliament.   Lot's of other cool stuff happened too but we were asleep.

We're awake now, so expect more up-to-date "reporting" from now on :)

30Aug/100

Australian Politicians are Well Hung

Article by: Peanut Cup

It seems a Winter election hasn't frozen the Aussie political libido with the Australian Federal Election 2010 ending with a hung Parliament.  We now have three independents who are being feverishly courted by the two major parties.  Tony Abbott turned up at each man's house offering to "clean the pool" dressed as a lifesaver.  Needless to say he was taken up on his offer because each pool was neglected with all the campaigning that had been going on.  Meanwhile, Julia Gillard met with the independent senators in the house of mirrors, which allowed the senators to see if she was holding a knife behind her back.

It's going to be a close competition with both leaders enjoying immense popularity that has no chance of waning.  We'll keep you updated as more news trickles in.

Election 2010 Well Hung

Independents look likely to rake it in

30Aug/100

Bill Heffernan is the devil

Article by: Peanut Cup

Better the Devil you know.

29Mar/108

Tony Abbott is Iron Man

Article by: Peanut Cup

Tony Abbott comes to the stark realisation, he IS Iron Man.

25Mar/106

‘Turn your lights on’ urges ‘think’-tank

Article by: Cherry Ripe

''Don't be stuck in the dark with the communists. Turn your lights on!''. Anti-Earth Hour.

17Mar/100

Wilson Shmucky?

Article by: Mint Pattie

Liberal senator Wilson Tuckey says "No fat chicks!"